Cold Winter's Day (XMen, gen, Wolverine)
Jun. 9th, 2003 11:35 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
gilascaveIt helps if you've read the comic "Origin: True Story of Wolverine" but I don't think it's necessary. Movie fic, primarily. No spoilers for XMen 2, vague spoilers for "Origin: True Story of Wolverine."
Cold Winter's Day
by James
It was cold outside, cold enough that only mutants would venture out -- only those preferred the cold, or did not feel it. Some of the children were playing in the snow, laughing and flinging snowballs and ice balls and god knew what else at each other. There were only four of them; the rest were inside by the fireplaces or huddled in their rooms, looking out windows and shivering at the sight.
Logan stood under a tree, no longer watching the students play. He'd not come out to chaperone them -- Xavier did that from wherever he was, and he did it well enough that Logan didn't even bother glancing back when one of the girls shrieked. A few seconds later there was laughter, and he heard Bobby's voice rise above the rest for a moment.
A thin trail of smoke rose from the end of his cigar. Logan inhaled, feeling it pull into his lungs. A brief flare of heat in his lungs, then the cold burned it away. He took another drag, but he wasn't trying to feel its miniscule heat. The cold didn't bother him. As far as he knew, it never had. He felt it -- but it didn't bother him.
He looked out into the woods surrounding the school. A few animals had scurried out of whatever burrows and dens they had, foraging through the snow for food. Even those built for winter were moving slowly today in the bitter cold.
He walked away from the school, out into the woods. Some distance away he heard a crash, some animal falling through branches. A large animal, perhaps even a deer. His head turned towards the sound and he had the urge to go investigate. Even as he heard the animal moving away, he found his footsteps begin to track it.
It was only when Logan realised what he was thinking -- the animal sounded like it had been slowed down, perhaps even injured -- that he realised what he was doing and brought himself up short. He deliberately turned and walked in another direction.
He walked through the snow, winding his way through bare trees and wind-blown snowdrifts. He watched the ground before him, catching sight of the tracks left here and there. Nothing more dangerous than rabbits. He ignored them, continued walking, letting his mind stay as empty as he could. Concentrated on the grounds around him, making certain he didn't step into a hidden ravine, or slip on a patch of ice.
Not that he wouldn't get rescued if he did, but he wasn't out here to get embarrassed. Logan wasn't sure he could explain why he was out here, other than the fact that he could. With almost everyone shut away in the house, complaining about the cold and sitting around the fireplaces, he'd been unable to resist the urge. Go outside, spend the afternoon hours away from them all. Surround himself with snow and silence and not think about things he didn't know if the mindreaders in the house were listening to.
When the deer tracks crossed his path, he stopped. Found himself turning in their direction again. They weren't fresh, but not more than a few hours old as the wind hadn't had time to cover them with powder. Logan shook his head, angry for a second before beating that down, too. Stood still for a moment until he re-gained a sense of serenity -- though he knew as little where that came from, as did the voice in his head telling him to follow the deer.
*They need to eat*, his mind whispered, and he shook his head. Whoever they were, he wasn't their provider anymore. Anyone he knew was housed up safely, with modern conveniences like deep freezers and people who could fly into town and buy the groceries.
The serenity was harder to come by than the simple matter of forcing himself to walk forward. Words whispered themselves to him, but they didn't make sense. Was it another man's voice, saying those things in his memory? Or was it his own, made unrecognisable by the thick blanket that muffled those memories until they might have been from daydreams, or tv shows he'd caught in the endless line of bars that he did remember.
Logan sighed. His 'nature walk' was becoming less and less restful. Looking once more around him, he saw the same layers of snow, felt the bite of the cold wind. He could still hear the rustle of animals foraging for food, and the more distant sound of children playing. But it no longer drew him on. Something in the distance woods was calling at him, but he was suddenly afraid of what it might be. Truth, delusion, an inexplicable hunger for something his mind said he should not need.
He turned around, and started walking back towards the school. There were things there he did not need, and liked needing even less. But the warmth of the building and the sounds of children talking and running through the hallways was at least something he knew he could grow comfortable with. This was his life now, and as things went, it wasn't that bad.
Even if it was the echo of howling that felt like home.
the end
Cold Winter's Day
by James
It was cold outside, cold enough that only mutants would venture out -- only those preferred the cold, or did not feel it. Some of the children were playing in the snow, laughing and flinging snowballs and ice balls and god knew what else at each other. There were only four of them; the rest were inside by the fireplaces or huddled in their rooms, looking out windows and shivering at the sight.
Logan stood under a tree, no longer watching the students play. He'd not come out to chaperone them -- Xavier did that from wherever he was, and he did it well enough that Logan didn't even bother glancing back when one of the girls shrieked. A few seconds later there was laughter, and he heard Bobby's voice rise above the rest for a moment.
A thin trail of smoke rose from the end of his cigar. Logan inhaled, feeling it pull into his lungs. A brief flare of heat in his lungs, then the cold burned it away. He took another drag, but he wasn't trying to feel its miniscule heat. The cold didn't bother him. As far as he knew, it never had. He felt it -- but it didn't bother him.
He looked out into the woods surrounding the school. A few animals had scurried out of whatever burrows and dens they had, foraging through the snow for food. Even those built for winter were moving slowly today in the bitter cold.
He walked away from the school, out into the woods. Some distance away he heard a crash, some animal falling through branches. A large animal, perhaps even a deer. His head turned towards the sound and he had the urge to go investigate. Even as he heard the animal moving away, he found his footsteps begin to track it.
It was only when Logan realised what he was thinking -- the animal sounded like it had been slowed down, perhaps even injured -- that he realised what he was doing and brought himself up short. He deliberately turned and walked in another direction.
He walked through the snow, winding his way through bare trees and wind-blown snowdrifts. He watched the ground before him, catching sight of the tracks left here and there. Nothing more dangerous than rabbits. He ignored them, continued walking, letting his mind stay as empty as he could. Concentrated on the grounds around him, making certain he didn't step into a hidden ravine, or slip on a patch of ice.
Not that he wouldn't get rescued if he did, but he wasn't out here to get embarrassed. Logan wasn't sure he could explain why he was out here, other than the fact that he could. With almost everyone shut away in the house, complaining about the cold and sitting around the fireplaces, he'd been unable to resist the urge. Go outside, spend the afternoon hours away from them all. Surround himself with snow and silence and not think about things he didn't know if the mindreaders in the house were listening to.
When the deer tracks crossed his path, he stopped. Found himself turning in their direction again. They weren't fresh, but not more than a few hours old as the wind hadn't had time to cover them with powder. Logan shook his head, angry for a second before beating that down, too. Stood still for a moment until he re-gained a sense of serenity -- though he knew as little where that came from, as did the voice in his head telling him to follow the deer.
*They need to eat*, his mind whispered, and he shook his head. Whoever they were, he wasn't their provider anymore. Anyone he knew was housed up safely, with modern conveniences like deep freezers and people who could fly into town and buy the groceries.
The serenity was harder to come by than the simple matter of forcing himself to walk forward. Words whispered themselves to him, but they didn't make sense. Was it another man's voice, saying those things in his memory? Or was it his own, made unrecognisable by the thick blanket that muffled those memories until they might have been from daydreams, or tv shows he'd caught in the endless line of bars that he did remember.
Logan sighed. His 'nature walk' was becoming less and less restful. Looking once more around him, he saw the same layers of snow, felt the bite of the cold wind. He could still hear the rustle of animals foraging for food, and the more distant sound of children playing. But it no longer drew him on. Something in the distance woods was calling at him, but he was suddenly afraid of what it might be. Truth, delusion, an inexplicable hunger for something his mind said he should not need.
He turned around, and started walking back towards the school. There were things there he did not need, and liked needing even less. But the warmth of the building and the sounds of children talking and running through the hallways was at least something he knew he could grow comfortable with. This was his life now, and as things went, it wasn't that bad.
Even if it was the echo of howling that felt like home.
the end